09 February 2009

I Have Freedom...Sometimes, Somewheres

There are some places in my country and others that I would be free to be married to someone of the same sex:

Massachusetts. Connecticut. California (for around 20 weeks this year). New York (if it is from another state where it is legal).

Canada. Belgium. Norway. The Netherlands. South Africa. Spain.

There are other states and countries that recognize civil unions and/or domestic partnerships - not the name of marriage. In some cases, not the protections of a marriage contract.

My girlfriend's is having a baby. I am flying in next month hoping that this child will remember the schedule we have discussed more and more frequently as the due date approaches (Yes, I know how unlikely that is - I've had two of my own).

But, we aren't married. Nor does she live in one of the above states. (I do. But anyways...) The possibility of not being allowed in when she gives birth, while small, is still a possibility. Really? We could be denied access to our loved ones because we do not have a piece of paper? We do not have the right to be with the one we love?

Sure, we could file for health proxies, second parent adoptions, joint tenancy of homes, powers of attorney, wills and living trusts, etc. etc...but with the simple word "marriage", at least in the United States, most of these are commonly accepted as given. Why should LGBTs have to jump through hoops to be entitled to what heterosexuals do? Why should we be denied it because we aren't allowed to have this piece of paper?

There is a lot of talk about religion. There is a lot of talk about rights. There is a lot of talk about beliefs, values and discrimination.

I live in a country that was founded on Freedom. Why then do we not apply it evenly? For everyone? Where is the Love in that?

1 comment:

  1. *nodding sadly* My wife and I are somewhat lucky that my mom is very accepting and knows that Jo and I have discussed all the "icky" stuff like wills and medical and end-of-life and she would not stand in Jo's way if something happened. However, Jo's aunts and uncles (her parents are deceased) are convinced we are both going to h*ll (and it's all my fault) and would be pushing their way into the fray. Of course, since they haven't spoken to her in... 6 years(?) it is unlikely they would even know if something happened.

    Still, she's been a full time volunteer for 7 years now. We've been living on my wages alone. But, since the house is in both our names, the survivor could easily lose the house if she doesn't have enough to pay the gift/inheritance taxes on it.

    Thankfully, I work for a company that allows me to put Jo on my benefits, so we at least don't have to pay for an additional health insurance policy. Small blessings. :)